Voice Dialogue refers to the complete body of work of Dr Hal Stone and Dr Sidra Stone. This includes the Voice Dialogue technique, which is used for personal growth and development, in counselling, relationship coaching and therapy, and as a tool with other healing modalities. Voice Dialogue also refers to the theory underpinning the technique, known as the Psychology of Selves and the Aware Ego Process.

Voice Dialogue is safe and empowering personal growth work, and it complements and enhances most other types of psycho-spiritual consciousness work.

Voice Dialogue enables you to become aware of and embody the richness and depth of who you are. It directly connects you with the various parts of your psyche – your inner selves or energy patterns.

When you become conscious of your selves – both those that protect you and control your life and those that are hidden and buried – you gain the most amazing rewards.

Old patterns will shift more easily, stubborn blocks will dissolve, and your relationships will transform.

Connecting with Your Inner Selves

Just like the many inner petals of a rose are hidden before it blooms, with only a few visible on the outside, you too have only a few selves visible on the outside, with many more hidden underneath, layered over one another, protecting your core.

The Outgoing Self

That part of yourself you feel is you, that holds your conscious rules, values and much of your personal history, is your primary self. This primary self developed in your childhood to protect you and enable your survival. It is who you have come to identify as (you might call it your ego or your personality).

This primary self does an amazing job (you’re alive!) but it is limited by its nature – by its perceptions, abilities, energy and rules. And so therefore you’re limited by its nature.

For instance, if you developed a highly Responsible self because that’s what worked for you in your family system, then as an adult you may be someone who others depend on but you might also find it difficult to let go, to be spontaneous and to have fun.

Or if you developed a strong Analytical Mind then you may find it challenging to express and understand feelings (your own and other people’s) or to feel at all.

Or if you became a Pleaser, then you probably find it impossible to feel entitled to take for yourself and have your own needs met.

You actually have many selves that make up your personality. A bit like an onion with its many layers, or an orchestra with its many instruments and players.

The Perfectionist

Some selves you accept and include in the package that’s ‘you’, while others are relegated to your ‘shadow’ where you judge them or have little or no awareness of them.

Usually different selves emerge at different times.

So your Achiever or Perfectionist may be who you are at work. But your Nurturing Parent may be who emerges with your children.

In your relationship you may sometimes be your Playful Self or Sensual Self, but at other times your Critical Father/Mother or Needy Self takes over.

It could be that you are always operating from one self or a group of selves that work together, such as the Responsible Self or the Pleaser, and you struggle to ever express other parts of yourself.

How your selves are ‘configured’ in you will determine the choices you make and how you behave and feel. 

Each part of you holds particular memories and has a narrative about your life, from its experience of it. Each self has preferences for how you live your life and goals it would like you to achieve. Each self also has anxieties and concerns. 

So when you’re setting goals, imagining a future, healing the past, your results will depend on who in you is involved.

That has massive implications for how your life and relationships play out.

If you’d like to become more conscious in how you experience your life, then becoming aware of and integrating your selves is key. 

The Spiritual Self

How Voice Dialogue Will Help

Get my FREE ebook Which Inner Self is Running Your Life? for an example of how Voice Dialogue will help you in an everyday situation. It also gives you an overview of 20 selves, and a simple exercise to discover your own primary and disowned selves.

Then check out this page about Voice Dialogue or go directly to one of my articles on how Voice Dialogue can help with relationships, parenting, setting boundaries, decision-making, handling stress, accessing creativity, spirituality, and more. (There are links to all articles in the menu at the top of each page on this site).

My articles include both explanatory information and practical exercises and techniques you can start now.

You can also purchase my books (please do as the funds help with the running costs of this freely available site), the videos and audios featuring Voice Dialogue’s creators Drs Hal and Sidra Stone demonstrating this work, and books from other teachers.

You’ll also find links to facilitators worldwide who offer private Voice Dialogue sessions and training.

And if you have any questions, please get in touch via the comments section at the end of most pages here or via Facebook or Instagram.

Remember to get Which Inner Self is Running Your Life? to start you on the process of learning about your selves.